Perched high above Durham's downtown, Heinrich von Moneybottoms represents the last of Durham's original building-dwelling gnomes. He unobtrusively made his first appearance nearly one year ago and has displayed remarkable patience while awaiting his Durham Gnomes debut.
Recently, we asked Heinrich from whence he draws this passivity and restraint. He lowered his head and humbly offered this explanation: "I once was like these younger gnomes, quick to jump on the latest bandwagon, drawn to the bling and the sparkle, ignorant of the consequences of my actions. In 1997, I was blinded by ambition and dreams of being the wealthiest gnome in America. Fortune Magazine became my Bible, and I threw all my wealth into a promising energy company called Enron. My accountants at Arthur Andersen assured me this was a sound investment."
Heinrich sighs before continuing: "Four years later, well... you know the rest of the story. Impatience and greed - they got me nowhere. I swore off investing forever and joined an ashram in the Himalayas. This is where I learned the value of patience, mindfulness, and detachment."
As Heinrich explains it, he is currently carrying out his penance, holding spiritual court over one of downtown Durham's financial centers, engaging in daily prayer and meditation as he observes the transactions taking place below. "If, by my presence, I am able to curb the materialistic desires of just one Durhamite, I will have done my duty."
In the spirit of steadfast self-flagellation, Heinrich retains the Moneybottoms surname as a reminder of his own weakness and tendency toward avarice. "I am still a gnome and only a gnome. I am flawed and powerless without daily [yoga] practice, fasting, and prayer."
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